Love After Divorce: I Married My Best Friend

1. How old were you when you got a divorce?

I was 26 years old when I got divorced.

2. How long before you found somebody?

Three years after my divorce, I met my now-husband.

3. How do you feel about remarrying after divorce?

I never thought I would ever remarried again or have more children. Though, I knew not all men were the same. I didn't want to put my daughter through something that isn't permanent. My daughter was the motivation that fueled me up every day and kept me going.

4. How long did you wait before you started dating?

There were many men, but it was never serious enough for me to bring it home to meet my daughter. I kept that part very private unless the line was drawn clearly that it is no more than friendship. I was really quick to always be up and leave. I didn't leave much room for anyone to get to know me or know them. I kept a lot of things to myself and kept moving forward. 

5. What was the dating scene like for you?

The dating scene was no more than meeting new people and that was it. Nothing more or less.

6. What did you learn from your first marriage?

I've learned from my first marriage to not just stay marry because you're trying to do the right thing for your child/children. Marry someone base on love that you clearly and cautious want to spend the rest of your life filling up the marriage with love every day. Every day, you are choosing that marriage and you chose to stay with you spouse because this person compliment and adds value to your life.

7. What did you look for in your first marriage vs. your 2nd marriage?

I didn't look for anything in my 2nd marriage at all. I wasn't looking to be remarried. I was so set on the fact that it will be just my daughter and I. I was absolutely fine with that. All I knew that I didn't want the same thing, or else I would had stay and dealt with.

8. Do you have kids and how did that affect your dating and when you remarried?

I have one child from this marriage. Beside the fact that I needed to make sure I had a sitter, I never saw that having my daughter was affecting dating men or when I got remarried. I was an open book about my daughter. I never hid about my daughter or feel ashamed about it. The day I decided to have my daughter was the day my mind was made up that she is a part of me. She was the good part of me. She made me a better person every day. With or without her my daughter's father, she was never the problem. Let it alone, it was my decision that got me where I am, not my daughter.

9. Are you happy in your marriage right now?

Indeed, I'm very happy in my marriage. Not to say I'm completely happy. I appreciated and very blessed to have what I have today. My husband is not perfect, nor am I. I wouldn't trade what I have with him for anyone's else.

10. How do you think you're different now than your first marriage?

I'm a lot different now than my first marriage. I got my LIFE back and it was the best part. I never have to pretend to be someone else so that my husband can be comfortable with himself. I get to be myself and recognize the woman I am every time I looked in the mirror. I get to have a relationship with my family and they love the man I am married to. I didn't only have a husband but I married my best friend. I was able to expressed freely without judgement. 

11. What did your parents, relatives, and friends think?

Everyone who had met my now-husband, then-boyfriend, liked him. He was such a people person that I never have to worried about taking him with me anywhere. 

12. What do believe about love?

What I believe about love might not be everyone's theory. To be loved and love someone has to come from within at your own freewill. You don't get to pick and choose when it is convenient to receive it or to give. Is it worthy for you to take on? Love is always there. Are you ready to deal with it?

If you have experienced love after divorce and would like to share your story, please write us at kaolee @ thestoryclothshop.com. 

- The Story Cloth Shop Team