The Nyab Series: Teen Wives
For a long time, we've wondered how other nyabs (daughter-in-laws) felt. If you are a girl, then most likely you grew up with expectations and were raised to be a wife. A huge part of our culture identity as women were to become great wives someday. So as young girls, you were learning the duties of a homemaker. When we dreamed up The Story Cloth Shop, we wanted to hear what other people had to say. We wanted to allow fellow brothers and sisters to speak up and share how they truly felt. This series was birthed out of the desire to know and better understand how nyabs feel across the board.
Every nyab's experience is different. Because we are all collectively different and unique people, responses will be different as well. We did not include names to keep the identities of these young and brave nyab's confidential. What matters most is that they were open to sharing their own experiences and we want to share them here for you to know (if you're a nyab), that you're not alone.
This week, we share with you interviews we did with 2 young nyabs (teen wives). Maybe your response is alot like theirs or maybe not.
If you're a nyab, what have your experiences been like? Please contact us if you want to be included in The Nyab Series. We'd love to hear different perspectives and experiences.
Photographs credit to Hive Mind
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The one thing I have to remind myself is that all marriages have the same struggle. As a teen I knew I wouldn’t be a good nyab. That I could not live up to everyone’s expectations nor did I want to. So I decided at that point that I wouldn’t marry a Hmong because I wouldn’t be good enough. Nejng married doe over 10 years now, I see that although difficult in culture, all marriages has some type of expectations. I still feel the same way I do as a teenager. I see my siblings and what they are expected to do and endure and I know I wouldn’t be able to do it. I dont blame our culture just that I cant see myself living up to some of these expectations.
Would love to participate as well. The answers are interesting as they vary depending on length of marriage.
I can relate to the first person’s interview. Being a nyab is the hardest obstacle that I’ve faced at the age of 19, along with having 2 child before the age of 21 as well. Hang in there!
I see two different huge world from these two interviews.
Sometimes only time would tell you how much you can and cannot endure as a Nyab. Being a Nyab, is too much of a responsibility and it’s sadden because the husband isn’t bought up to the same expectations also.